Thirty Days Of Hard Time Or Worse

           Ohioans know that getting your pet fish drunk
   Will probably get you thrown in the clink
          It's best to think twice and again before you offer up that drink

                   Similarly, most Canadians are well aware
            That painting your front door deep purple is a crime
                  It may not get you prison but you'll probably pay a fine

     If you're not wearing underwear when you leave your house in Thailand
Be ready to be made poorer by quite a few hundred Baht
    Though if you're wearing trousers it's probably difficult to get caught

            Apartment dwellers in Switzerland learn to carefully time their poops
     500 hundred years of neutrality doesn't mean they won't call the police
           As flushing a toilet after 10 pm is considered disturbing the peace

              While in Venice it is wise to be aware
       That the feeding of pigeons is never, ever encouraged
              The fines are stiff enough that even the celebrities in PeTA are discouraged 
                                       
                Not everyone in the world is a fan of funnyman Jerry Lewis
        But in Cannes, France the residents still revere him as a comic genius
               And wearing a mask that mocks his appearance is an offense fairly serious

   In Italy where fashion is king there is no law against polyester
Unless you are obese and you're caught in a suit made of that  
   They'll charge you with public indecency (I wonder if that includes a wrinkle-free hat)    
             It's difficult to imagine how the Chinese enforce this
          But being as how the policy in place is one child per couple
             If you're born a twin how do they decide which one's the criminal double?