Eddie Arana, Rick Thibodeau, & Chris Bakunas San Diego, Ca. March 2012

Eddie Arana, Rick Thibodeau, & Chris Bakunas San Diego, Ca. March 2012
Eddie Arana, Rick Thibodeau, & Chris Bakunas at Luche Libre Taco Shop in San Diego, March 2012

Saturday, July 5, 2025

The Interrogation Of Morton

   He sat at the table in a cold unpadded steel chair that had him facing a grizzled, unshaven and probably twice-as-tired as he was Detective Sergeant and asked him if he could have a smoke.

  The Detective Sergeant reacted to his request with a little surprise, telling him more than asking, "I thought you said you didn't smoke?'

   With a slight nod he replied, "I don't, not for quite awhile anyway - quit when I was thirteen, after I joined the wrestling team. But I've watched a lot of police procedural shows, and that seems like something that people being questioned by the police do, you know, as part of the routine."

   The DS chuckled, then stated flatly, "That's a riot, but there's no smoking in here - Hollywood never gets the details right." 

   "Oh, okay, guess I can't get any coffee either, eh?"

   "Nope, no coffee either. We used to provide coffee, but too many perps started throwing it or spitting it out at us, so no more coffee."

   "Bummer - but if I fall asleep on ya', it's on you. I am kinda tired."

   "Mr Bixler, I appreciate your concern, but if we can get back to the situation at hand, we can probably wrap this up fairly quickly. Now, please tell me one more time how it was you became involved in the burglary at the FirstTrust Bank branch in Charlotte."

   "Like I've told you three times already Detective, I wasn't involved in the burglary, I just happened to be walking by the bank when I saw the door was wide open. I thought it was odd, so I took a look inside to see what was going on. That's when one of the actual burglars grabbed me and pulled me into the building and told me to sit on the floor and stay quiet - which was all of 10 seconds before the bank was surrounded by squad cars. That's it, that's all I had to do with the burglary at the FirstTrust Bank branch, I'm an innocent bystander, or if anything, an eyewitness to a crime."

   The Detective Sergeant drummed the fingers of his left hand on the steel table top while twirling a pen in his right hand. He looked directly into the face of Morton Bixler for a full minute without saying a word. Morton shifted in his seat a little, the stare of the DS making him slightly uncomfortable.

   "You have been in this room for almost a full thirty minutes Mr. Bixler, and you have yet to request a lawyer. Most perps want a lawyer within the first 5 minutes. Extremely rare for anyone to sit where you are and not request a lawyer Mr. Bixler."

   "Yeah? Well, I don't need a lawyer seeing as how I am not a 'perp'. I'm just doing what any good, taxpaying citizen would do to help the law with a criminal matter, and I will confess that at first it was pretty exciting to be an eyewitness that could provide some information that might help put some bad guys away, but truth be told, it's now getting to be a bit tedious, eh?"

   Now it was the Detective's turn to shift uncomfortably in his seat. DS Cameron was beginning to believe the man sitting across from him was indeed just an innocent bystander, something that that he absolutely hated thinking as it went against everything he believed about people found at 3:00 in the morning at crime scenes they really had no believable reason for being at. Who goes for a walk downtown at 3:00 in the morning? Bixler hadn't been drinking, so the whole meandering drunk deal was quickly ruled out. He said he had just simply been walking by the bank and saw the door open - could the burglars have been so stupid as to leave the door open? Criminals have done dumber things, sure, but he couldn't recall any burglars who had left doors open while trying to steal from a bank. Still... stranger things had happened.

   "Okay, Mr. Bixler, one last time. Tell me everything you can recall from, let's say, three blocks before you reached the FirstTrust Bank branch until the squad cars arrived."

   Morton intertwined his fingers as he placed his hands on the tabletop. "Three blocks from the FirstTrust Bank I crossed from the QuickSip store on Farage Ave and 17th to the 18th block of Farage. I walked briskly under the light of the quarter moon and the ever-dim street lights. The air is still in the city at that time of the morning - it's quiet, except for the sound of the rats rummaging through the garbage in the alleys. Everything was closed up, so I didn't hear anything but the wind and the rats. Maybe the faint rumble of a few long-haul trucks on the expressway a half mile or so further down Farage. That kind of quiet is something I truly enjoy, which is why I take my walks so early in the morning. It is very serene, very peaceful. The birds aren't even up yet. Anyhow, I continued walking along Farage until I crossed over from 18th to the 19th block, and continued to enjoy the silence. The street lights in that area are all fairly dim, probably because they only get changed out if they burn out, which means they are all pretty old I imagine. It adds to the mystique of the early morning hour though, so I don't mind it at all. After I crossed from 19th to the 20th block, that's when I encountered the FirstTrust Bank building and saw the open door, and that's when I foolishly stuck my head inside the open door, and that's when I was grabbed by the burglar and made to sit on the floor, and ten seconds later the squad cars showed up. That's all I can recall from the three blocks before I reached the FirstTrust Bank branch until the squad cars arrived."

   Detective Cameron's appearance did not reveal any of the frustration he felt as he listened patiently to Morton Bixler's story. But frustrated he was, deeply so. Something did not fit, but it was beyond him what it was that didn't fit. The four other men they had arrested at the bank all stated he wasn't part of their outfit, but he'd known plenty of crooks who would rather die that turn stoolie - especially if it meant turning on someone who could be the head of the organization.

   "Okay, Mr. Bixler. Before I turn off this recorder, is there anything, even the slightest, littlest thing you can think of that might be of interest that happened before or after you encountered the FirstTrust Bank branch on 20th and Farage?"

   "No Detective, I'm sorry, but I've told you everything I can recall."

   "Well then, you're free to go. Can we drop you anywhere?"

   Morton Bixler looked over at the Detective as he rose from his chair, smiled, and said, "No thanks DS Cameron, I can walk home from here."

   

   

Thursday, July 3, 2025

Home Is Where You Find A Place To Sleep

For as long as there have been villages, towns, or cities on this planet
There have been alleys or doorways or abandoned buildings 
Where homeless people have taken up residence
Whether it was for one night or for as long as they could stay without eviction
They considered that alley or doorway or abandoned building
Their temporary home

For as long as there have been homeless people on this planet
There have been well-meaning people trying to find them permanent homes
But despite their best well-intentioned efforts
Those well-meaning people have failed to make the slightest dent
In the homeless population

For those well-meaning people have failed to realize
That there are a lot of people
Who do not want to be permanently housed in boxes with roofs
That only serve the purpose
Of keeping them cloistered away from those who don't
Want to have to see them sleeping in the streets


Wednesday, July 2, 2025

Signaling Her Desires

The boy was boasting once again
About meeting the most gorgeous woman you'd ever seen
Blonde and blue, full lips and porcelain skin
She was hotter than hot, a full-on beauty queen

The men gathered at the table shared a chuckle
They'd all heard this story a hundred times before
He'd been telling it since he first sprouted stubble
There probably wasn't a girl in town he hadn't fallen for

This time it's different he loudly bellowed
This girl is not only a stunner, she's also into me!
She gave her name and number and we even took a photo
Then he pulled out his phone and said, Take a look and see!

Old Jim put on his readers and took a cursory glance
Then handed the phone over to the other men to inspect 
Each of them snickered a little when they viewed the new romance
His phone was handed back to him as if it was suspect

Each of the men looked at each other as if they shared a secret
And each of the men nodded as if silently voting on who would reveal it
After several minutes the room became as silent as a crypt
Until old Jim cleared his throat and said, Alright, I'll spit 

Jim then took a long sip of coffee before he said to him
Son, don't you see she's flashing the V
Letting the women know of her availability
And that you are not her preferred cup of tea

What the hey! The boy spat right back at the men
Are you trying to tell me she's playing for the other team?
Why in tarnation would she give me her name and number then?
You old coots don't know nothing you're throwing water on my dream

Suit yourself, one of the other old men said grumpily
But you're young and you would do well to listen
The world is full of beautiful young ladies who will share a man's company
But have a decidedly different preference when it comes to huggin' and a kissin'

The boy stared at the picture on the 3 X 4 screen
And his thumb hovered over the little garbage can of delete
He knew the men were right about what her fingers were supposed to mean
And decided that if they went out it would be straight up dutch treat

 

Monday, June 30, 2025

Totally Ethical


 

Reminiscing About The Bad Ol' Days

   She said, casually; "It was twenty years ago today I was convicted. They took me right from the courthouse to the jail, didn't even get a chance to get my things together."

   I just nodded my head as she continued. "I was put in what they called a pod, with a bigger group of women who had all been convicted of the same kind of offenses, and we were all Veterans."

  Without much of a pause for breath she followed that with "They had three pods just for Veterans...three pods. Now, not all of those Veterans had received Honorable discharges, I'll give you that, but some of us had, and it's just a damn shame we all ended up in a civvy jail like that."

   She looked wistfully out the window after she took a sip of her coke, and a little smile came to her face as she added, "Uh, 'course I was doing crack back then, and I was absolutely batshit crazy."