Sometimes the expression of appreciation offered at a given moment can feel inadequate at a later date. Such is the case for me regarding the thanks I may (or may not) have expressed to the various people who graced my life over the years and were more than just kind or friendly towards me. They are the people who I owe a debt of gratitude too that goes beyond the pale.
Writers dedicate novels to the people who inspired or assisted them, musicians usually add a "Without whom..." blurb on the inside cover of a CD, filmmakers are able to do the same at the end of the credits, and of course, all of the aforementioned get opportunities to publicly express gratitude at the various awards ceremonies.
I always read those thank yous as a kind of reverse eulogy. At a funeral people make statements about how much the deceased meant to them, and afterwards, at the wake, talk about how they had always wished they had told the deceased how much they really meant to them while they were still alive.
Well, screw that noise, I'm going to tell everybody I can think of just how grateful I am right here and now.
I'll start with an all-encompassing thanks to everyone I have ever had the pleasure to know. With very, very few exceptions, each and every one of you contributed to making my life the wonderful adventure it's been.
I've been struggling with the order I should list everybody, as I would hate to give anybody the impression they were less important to me than someone else simply because they are further down on the list.
Okay, I've been sitting here for going on twenty minutes due a horrible realization.
I can't remember everybody's full name. Hell, I can't recall a number of people by name at all. This is...bad.
I'm going to have to rule out actually thanking people by name. I realize that is somewhat lame, but it's for the best, really.
I'd hate to offend someone, anyone, when I'm attempting to express some serious gratitude, but with my piss-poor memory, it would more likely than not happen.
I thought about breaking it down into a family, friends, co-workers, acquaintances, etc. order, but that would be tricky in situations with people who are my friends and also co-workers, or acquaintances who are also family.
You probably know exactly what I mean.
I think I'll do this in chronological order, from my earliest memories until the present day.
Which means I'll start with my family. A infinite amount of thanks to my mother, of course, for doing everything she could with the extremely meager resources available to her. It took me a long time to realize what a shit I was when I was younger, and how much hell I put my mother through.
Raising 6 kids, by herself, in an suburban ghetto...I will never be able to express enough gratitude towards her, ever.
My siblings, my 3 older sisters, my older and my younger brother, all have my undying gratitude as well, if only for not killing me while I slept. There were a number of occasions where most courts would have ruled such an action on their part as justified.
There are a lot of people I grew up with that I owe a couple of truckloads of gratitude to - my friends of course, the ones that made childhood fun, adventurous, and exciting - but I would be grievously remiss if I didn't thank all of their parents.
The parents of my friends really did a lot to make my childhood bearable, not only for me, but for my Mom as well.
Whether it was taking me to the beach or fishing, camping, or to the movies - even to Disneyland on a couple of occasions - the parents of my friends invited me along and included me in on what most kids somewhat take for granted but I did not have available to me as one of six kids being raised by a poor single-parent.
The people who put together the San Diego Comic-Con and various Comic Book Store owners in San Diego (Comic Kingdom, Golden State Comics, Main Street Comics, that place on 8th & Broadway) also have my undying gratitude. They tolerated my little punk ass when they really did not have to (It wasn't like I was buying tons of merchandise from the stores).
Like most, I also have a lot of teachers I owe a debt of gratitude. From an adult perspective I now see how some of my teachers were just people doing a job, while others were truly interested in imparting not just an education, but life lessons as well. Whatever the case was for them, they all taught me something, and I am grateful for it.
My coaches, esp. my Wrestling coaches, did much more for me than they could ever imagine. Instilling confidence in a kid who spent nearly every day of his teen years feeling like the Pillsbury Doughboy is something I don't think I can ever repay.
The family that owned the carnival I worked for during the summers from when I was 14 until I left for the USAF, and all the guys I worked for and with on the Midway, looked out for me and taught me some of the more vital lessons every young man needs to learn, especially as a maturing teen. Big huge chunks of gratitude and thanks to all of you!
After basic, the USAF assigned me to a god-awful, isolated-from-everything-a-young-man-wants base in a barren desert in the Southwest. Fortunately, my compatriots at this bleak outpost were all great people. I spent four years of my life with some of the best people it has been my privilege and
pleasure to ever know. Thank each and every one of you!
Leaving the AF and getting back to S.D. was tough going for awhile, but once again my family, my friends from childhood (and parents of friends), came through. Not to be too much of a sycophant, but all of you people are the absolute best!
I also made some new friends, too, at college and at the various jobs I took. Big high fives to the students and teachers at Mesa, and my bosses and co-workers at every job I had - except for that one jerk at AG in Sorrento Valley (still would like to piss in his coffee).
I ended up making my way to Alaska after a few years back in S.D., and it was again my good fortune to make the acquaintance of a ton of flat-out terrific people.
I went to Alaska for many reasons, primary among them was to sober up and bring some semblance of order to my life. So many people helped me do just that I still have trouble comprehending how unbelievably lucky I got in making such caring, compassionate friends. I know a lot of it was of a pay-it-forward nature, but it escapes me how I'll ever be able to do the same for anyone.
When I left Alaska for Scotland, it was with a very heavy heart. I treasured the relationships I had developed in the last frontier. Mucho thanks to everyone who made it such a grand adventure.
Glasgow, Scotland is a fairly large city, easy to get lost in. But I still managed to meet some terrific people. I was there to learn more about art, about painting, and about myself, and I met people who helped me to do just that. Thank you all!
Back in the lower 48 after a decade, I made my way to Colorado. And here I remain. I again had the good fortune to chance upon some wonderful new friends.
I've been here for 15 years now, living in the same house for nearly 13 of those. I've had 3 different jobs and have made great friends at each of them. Some of the people I first met when I took my first job in Colorado are still great friends of mine to this day. They all added to my growth as a professional and as a human - each and everyone of them, in one way or another. You people all rock!
My neighbors have become great friends of mine, and have done much for me. We actually add immensely to one another's lives, so thanks to all of you!
Rereading all of what I just wrote, it seems lacking a bit. Thanks is much harder to express than just by saying thanks.
It may take another entry or two to adequately convey exactly how fortunate I feel for having been able to have had so many truly wonderful people in my life.
I am one lucky Dude.
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