Someone has sewn up all the holes
In my pre-ripped and worn jeans
And now I'm a little bit confused
Someone has sanded out all the scratches and gouges
In my distressed dining table
And I am not amused
Someone has cleaned out all the stains
In my factory soiled antiqued rug
And taken away the appeal of it looking old and used
Everything in my home now looks shiny and new
No more character blemishes can be seen
In my hand-planed hardwood floors
All my chairs are now solid
The stretchers have been refitted and re-glued
My guests will no longer feel as if they are in danger
Of falling off them
I'm at a loss at what to do
A guy works hard his whole life long
To acquire the finest beat up products one can buy
Hours spent in search of the best artificially tattered artifices
To create the best shabby-chic thrift-shop stylishness
Only to have it all taken away
By some unknown philistine
It's just not fair
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