Things Couples Really Shouldn't Yell At Each Other In Public*

   The police had been called to the shopping center by a shop manager who had noticed that a van in the parking lot had not moved in three days.

   Two officers had arrived on the scene in separate cruisers, parking on opposite sides of the van in a classic flanking move.

   As the two officers stood behind the van with one of them writing down the license plate info, the barn doors of the van burst open and two people tumbled out, tangled up as if in a wrestling match and screaming obscenities at one another.

   The two officers were momentarily surprised but quickly recovered and each one grabbed one of the wrestling duo and pulled them apart.

   The combatants, one a male, mid-thirties, wearing denim pants and a t-shirt (no shoes), the other a female, mid-thirties, wearing pajama pants and a long-sleeved shirt (no shoes), appeared to be stunned that they were suddenly in the hands of the police.

   Looking confused and extremely disheveled, the two van dwellers looked at each other for a few seconds.

   Then the woman screamed loudly, "He stole the van!!" 

   Immediately followed by the man shouting, "She has the meth in her purse!!"

   Then silence.

   Then handcuffs.

*Based on a incident witnessed one early Spring morning.