The Unintentionally Funniest Thing I've Heard This Week

                                     Dall Sheep, 30 miles south of Anchorage, Ak

Yesterday morning I was engaged in a conversation with a coworker about the NCAA Division I men's basketball championship game that was to be played that night featuring the UConn Huskies vs. the Kentucky Wildcats.

One of the women listening in on the conversation asked who I was favoring, and I replied, "UConn."

She then said that of course I would favor UConn, as I had lived in Alaska for awhile. Then she asked where UConn played.

I was puzzled by her statement and question, and replied, "Connecticut - they're the University of Connecticut's basketball team."

She looked at me and starting laughing, and said, "Ohhhh...I thought you meant Yukon, like the big SUV!"

Yep...NBA rosters are overflowing with 7 foot Inuits.

Exactly Who Is In Charge Here?

Ever consider who is really in charge? By in charge, I mean who's calling the shots on the planet, at the controls, pulling the reigns - that sort of thing.

There are 206 recognized countries/sorta self-ruling political entities on this planet, and each and everyone of them has a Head of the Government, and quite a few of those have both a Head of State along with a Head of the Government.

The Queen of England, for instance, is the head of state of 16 sovereign countries, and two other allied countries. That's a puzzle right there - it's 2014 and there are still Queens and Kings, Sultans and Emperors. Mind-boggling, actually.

Only a few of those unelected types remain though, as since the late 1780's, the right of people to chose their leaders by electing them has become quite popular. There are still countries that haven't quite got the hang of fair and open elections, but by and large there has been a lot of improvement over the inherited (or acquired via conquest) method of becoming a country's leader.

  That leader - Chief Executive, President, Prime Minister, Chancellor, Premier...the big cheese by any other name or title, is usually surrounded by a staff of Diplomats, Ambassadors, Secretaries. Attaches who advise or inform, help out in making the tough decisions, etc.

And the majority of those leaders have an Assembly, Parliament, Congress, Cabinet, etc., that deals with the creation and implementation of laws, policies, regulations, etc., and those are in turn supported by bureaucracies that do the actual work.

Of course, there are also military leaders - Generals and Admirals with some significant power/influence of their own.

There are over 7 billion people on the planet. The two countries with the largest populations, China and India, account for over 2.5 billion of 'em. The other 4.5 billion live in the remaining 204 countries/sorta self-ruling political entities.

Since I have no desire to attempt to figure out the mean average for population and determine what percentage of that population is running the show, I will use the United States as my average, Sure, it's actually the 3rd most populous country on the globe, but with only 317 million (+/-) people, it only represents about 7% of the remaining 4.5 billion, so somewhat of a happy medium.

The 317 million people in the United States have 1 President and 1 Vice President. There are 15 members of the President's cabinet, and 7 cabinet-level officers (well, 8 when you include the Vice-President, who by law is a cabinet-level officer).

That's 24 people right there. 17 men and 7 women.

There are also 100 Senators (2 from each state, regardless of population) and 435 voting members of the House of Representatives plus 6 non-voting members (each state is allotted a number of representatives based on population, btw), who collectively make up the U.S. Congress, so 535 people with some serious power right there.

That's 559 people running the show on the Federal level. If that number is extrapolated for all 50 states (all 50 states have Governors, Lt. Governors, State Senators, Representatives, etc.) we get 27,950 Grand Poohbahs. 559 is probably a little high for most states, but what the heck, it's a convenient number - so 27,950 people on the state level calling the shots.

Add that to the Federal bigwigs, we have 29,068 people. Throw in the Supreme court (9 Judges) and the DOD Chiefs (Secretary of Defense and the Joint Chiefs of Staff - 6 more people). and we are at 29,083 people.

Let's give the remaining 205 countries/sorta self-ruling political entities, regardless of population, that same number of Big Kahunas and multiply. We now have five million nine hundred sixty two thousand and fifteen Big Kahunas.

On a planet of 7 billion people.

That's about 3/4 of 1 percent of the world's population calling the shots.

Plus or minus a tenth of a percent.

Of course, there are other people who wield influence - Business and Religious leaders, Academics, Media Barons, Performing artists, etc.

However, influence is vastly different than power - it's as simple as this; People with influence sometimes have power, but people with power always have influence.

If being rich is considered being powerful, we can add the 10 million people on the planet who are worth 1 million dollars or more to the total...wait a minute, most of the powerful people in the total are part of the 10 million people that are worth a million or more, so let's be fair and only add half of the 10 million.

That would give us 10,962,015 Big Kahunas.

So, 1.5% of the population of the planet telling the rest of us how it's going to be.

My math is more approximate than exact, but it's close. Close enough to give one reason to ponder the nature of the human condition and why it seems so imperative for humans to have a leader. 

Rock On With The Rockies

The 2014 Major League Baseball season is under way, which for me is a great thing. Today I was able to attend the third game of the Rockies Home Opener series against the Arizona Diamondbacks, and it was a near-perfect day for a baseball game.

The Rockies had struggled to get their first win of the season against the inexplicably strong Florida Marlins, but those first three games were in Miami, so that could be written up as home-field advantage...

The Rox opened at home on Friday, beating the Diamondbacks handily. The home opener also served as an introduction for the newest addition to Coors Field, a remodeling of the upper deck of the left field stands into a party deck, named The RoofTop.

The crowd on the RoofTop was as happy and festive as a crowd of baseball fans with easy access to beer and spirits could be. The RoofTop offers not only a great birdseye view of Coors Field, but also panoramic views of the city of Denver and it's environs.

Coors Field is a great place to watch a ballgame, regardless of where you're sitting. Of course, if your seats are in the vicinity of the Mile High purple stripe, you might want to bring some binoculars.

Unfortunately, today's near-perfect day for baseball ended in a 5-3 loss for the Rockies - Mark Trumbo's 2 - run jack in the fifth proved to be the difference. What the hell were the Angels thinking letting Trumbo go? He is as good a power hitter as there is in MLB. 

Hopefully, the Rockies will play more like they did in the first two games of the Home Opener than they did today - that is, until the Pad's come to town - then they should just fold.

As Artifacts And The Technical Difficulties Of Doom

The Concord, California based band As Artifacts made a stop in Englewood this evening. The group was on the last leg of their Home Run Tour, with opening acts Beyond The Wreckage, Aspens, and Sinking Cities.

Originally booked for Helms Deep, a somewhat last minute change put tonight's show at the Rock House, a small venue on Broadway, just south of Belleview. The Rock House is an adjunct of a Youth Ministry that inexplicably plays host to a ton of Metal and Punk shows.

The first hour and a half featured some solid performances by bands that played their collective hearts out - unfortunately, all of the bands suffered from poor quality sound, especially the vocals. There was a point were the lead vocalist for Aspens was not being heard at all, a result of both being overwhelmed by the volume of the instruments in the band, and lack of volume from his mic. 

As Artifacts took the stage at around 10:00, and made every effort to get the crowd moving to their infectious metal. Unfortunately, they too were plagued by technical difficulties, not only from the mic the lead vocalist was using, but also from an amp used by the lead guitarist.

Still, their energy and enthusiasm was incredible, and served to get the crowd up and jumping. The set was brief, but it blazed hot and bright. These kids still have it, even with a few personnel changes and the aforementioned technical difficulties. 

The band will be in Salt Lake City tomorrow, and then on to Sparks, Nevada for a show Monday night. If you are in the vicinity of either of those areas, catching their show would be well worth your while.

Spring Snowday Thursday

                           The weather report said 3 to 5 inches...that is not 3 to 5 inches

             The streets are too warm from the 50's,60's temps of the past week for it to stick

               Had to drive up to Evergreen, got to check out the winter-ish wonderland 

                                          The white blanket makes for great contrasts

                       These guys are probably tired of having to forage through snow for meals

                                                               "Dude...ya' got any hay?" 

                                                 It's a weigh-down-the-branches wet snow 

                                                   Makes for "moderate" fire danger at least

                                                      One lone duck on a half frozen lake

                                                    And it'll all be gone by the weekend

Chainsaw Whittlin' in Lakewood

Some people cut down a tree and are left with a stump to remove. Then again, some people cut down a tree and leave enough stump to get creative, Here are a few examples of that creativity from my neighborhood.

A Satire Of Everything He Thought His Life Should Be

He had this idea that he could return to the village of his ancestors

And discover illuminating facts about his family and himself

Something that would shed a little light on his frustration

He fancied himself the descendant of an aristocrat

A proud noble, a landowner

That his destiny was to be noteworthy

If not actually great

So it was with more than a touch of disappointment

That he finally cobbled together the truth of his family

Ordinary people who led ordinary lives doing ordinary things

Scraping out a living, an existence, and making ends meet

No Kings or Queens, Princes or Princesses

Just the average, ordinary

Far from the hoped-for revolutionary

Simple folk

And, after a bit of reflection

He was alright with that