The drunken leprechaun wearing Oakley shades
Dodging cars while juggling hand grenades
Dancing with the blonde doing cartwheels on the highway
With her thumb stuck out hoping for a ride
Still wearing the dirty white dress of a jilted bride
Clears her throat gargling with razor blades
She calls him her old boy romper-stomper
He's still got a quick left he named the big bopper
When you see him comin' better set off the alarm
Just a mention of his name is enough to utterly terrify
Some say his father was a Nazi hiding out in Uruguay
Giving birth to him caused his mother to buy the farm
The blonde set up shop calling herself an oracle
She told everyone the truth, it was absolutely horrible
She was arrested, tried and convicted of predicting a false
Death
Told one poor soul he'd die by the sword
When a Samurai took a katana to his spinal cord
Fainted dead away they had to use smelling salts
Most nights they spend calling each other crazy
Driving around in circles in a battered old Mercedes
She cranks down the window and lets out a howl
While he babbles on about miracles of science
And how one day they'll breed giants
Looking lecherously at her he purrs with a low growl
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