Hidden Moon Of Infinite Sadness

 

The Great California Windmill Infestation

California is all in with the windmill game. There must be eleventy billion windmills in Southern California alone.

The Problem With Success

 

Success seems to have the power to induce amnesia. 

Success, even moderate success, can make you forget the struggles of your pre-successful days, the times you scrounged between the seat cushions for loose change, at least enough for bus fare so you could get downtown to the day labor office and hope to get a job for the day that would pay cash. or maybe get you to a pawn shop where you could get a few bucks for your alarm clock radio.

Success can make you forget the times you had to literally beg any friends or family members you hadn't already tapped out for a small loan, just until Friday or whenever your next payday was going to be.

Success can make you forget the thousand promises you made to yourself, the ones wherein you swore you would never, ever spend any windfalls on useless things, things that weren't worth anything to anyone just months after you bought them, and you would never, ever spend your money on partying with friends who were not really your friends anyway, and that you would learn to save, learn to invest, learn to prepare for the days when the tables were turned and you were no longer raking it in.

Success does that with incredible, mind boggling ease. 

Don't believe me? Try it and see. Work hard, become successful, and just watch how easily you will forget days you swore you never would.

 

In The Desert Forest

Into The Great Colorfield

 

 

This spectacular sunset is what I drove into as I was making my way to Bakersfield this past week. It was about as beautiful a sunset as I've ever seen, and it helped to lighten my heavy heart,

Embrace Wonder

.
 As if you were still a child...

Cracking Up

 

In Memory Of A Good Man

A man I was proud to be able to call my friend passed away earlier this month. He was a good man, a man with strength of character and an unwavering belief in justice and fairness. 

His name was Joaquin Rodriguez jr, though he was known to everyone as JR (not junior, "Jay-R").

   JR and I in an Anchorage fur store in March of 1990. Yes, we are wearing pink noses and bunny ears.

JR and I met in the mid 1980's in San Diego. We worked together for a couple of years and developed a friendship based on mutual interest and some shared roots.

We both were raised in Southeast San Diego, just a few miles from each other. We were the same age, but never attended the same schools - JR attended San Diego H.S., while I attended Morse. 

We had incredibly similar taste in music - he loved bands such as Oingo Boingo, Talking Heads, the B-52's, the Clash - pretty much everything played on 91X at the time - as did I.

He also loved to go on random adventures to places he'd never been, without a guidebook or a tour group, as did I. 

And he loved Halloween. JR probably loved Halloween more than I, which is saying alot.

JR and I on Halloween in 1988. JR made that freakin' monster costume from scratch! I went as a ghoul.

Of course being young men who desired young women, JR & I would go to clubs in SD quite a bit. We spent quite a few Fridays & Saturdays at Diego's, Billy Bones, the Halcyon, the Spirit - heck, we even went to a concert at the Jackie Robinson YMCA in hopes of meeting women who had similar taste in music as we did (nope, can't remember who played that show, some local punk bands, no established bands).

                 JR with his Halloween Snow Pumpkin he created in Anchorage in October 1989

In April of 1989 I decided I needed to get out of San Diego and move to Alaska. The story of why I made that move is told in one of my posts here, but long story short it was all about a relationship with a woman gone askew due to bad behavior on my part.

Flash forward to August of 1989 and I'm living in Anchorage with the woman who was the reason I left SD. One day I receive a letter from JR and in his letter he tells me that he too needs to leave SD for reasons, and he wants to know if he might be able to drive up to Alaska and stay with LLN & I for awhile, just until he can get settled into his own place.

Of course I wrote back immediately and said "get up here, you're going to love it!"

      Nothing says "I'm from San Diego" louder than cleaning snow off your car with a kitchen utensil

JR arrived in Anchorage after a week of driving. He got a job almost immediately after he arrived and got his own apartment a month later. 

Firmly ensconced in Anchorage, him and I, along with LLN, proceeded to spend weekends exploring Alaska

                                                         JR the Christmas tree wrangler

We once drove the enormous lasso that is the Seward, Glenn Allen. the Richardson, and the George Parks highways (LLN had gone back to Boston for the wedding of one of her friends, so we had a week to kill). It was a grand adventure even if it was exhausting.

 

                                         Shorts and T-shirt on a balmy April day in Alaska

    Die hard Chargers fan JR sporting his loyalty while enjoying a rare cloud-free view of Denali

                                        JR in the bowl, Fur Rondy in Anchorage, 1990

JR also possessed that same goofy, irrepressible sense of fun that I have, without fear of embarrassment or giving a hoot what others might think of him. He was definitely of the belief that life is meant to be a good time.

    John R, Joaquin R., and me at the Mongolian Bar-be-que restaurant for lunch, July 1994

JR eventually decided Alaska was not for him, and went back to SD a little over a year after he arrived. He had always wanted to serve and protect the public, and his intention was to become a law enforcement officer.

But he came back to Alaska a few years later for a short vacation, and it was one heckuva good time for us both. We went golfing (yes, you can golf in Alaska) fishing, hiking, and of course exploring. 

                                                   JR on the links in Palmer, Alaska

                              All geared up and ready to drop a line

                                                        JR at the summit of Flattop

Last year at this time I received a letter from JR. I was expecting it to be our annual catch up letter, but it was not. In this letter JR revealed that he had been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.

Needless to say, it was devastating to read.

Pancreatic cancer is merciless. JR was a fighter, a man who could meet any challenge. 

Fcuk pancreatic cancer.

My heart goes out to his wife and their son, his step-children, and his mother & siblings. He was one of the good ones, and taken much, much too young.

                                               Joaquin "JR" Rodriquez jr, 1963 - 2021

Rest in peace my friend.

Lopsided World

 Everything was out of balance.

Out of kilter, as it were.

Narcissistic, megalomaniacs had been voted into office

...Oh wait, that's fairly normal.

Things I Do Not Want To Deal With Anymore

Gullible people who feel compelled to share the latest conspiracy theory they're believing with me.

Advertising for formulaic, poorly directed and even more poorly filmed movies about couples who have no business being together but who end up together in the end. I don't have to watch the movies, but it's hard to dodge the ads.

Too much ice and not enough drink.

Extremists getting all the attention because it's what capture's journalists (or their editors) attention.

People using the word "bargain" to describe something of little or no real value being bought at a low price. A bargain is only a bargain if the object procured is of value, and the price was fair.

 

To Tolerate Or Not To Tolerate?

 I friend asked me what I thought should be considered an intolerable behavior - and he stressed intolerable, not something that was simply unacceptable.

I've never had any problem defining that, and I do not know why anyone else would.

Simply put, IMHO anything that takes advantage of or harms another human being is intolerable.

The Little Sculpture Garden That Could...Sorta

 

One Of The Glorious Joys Of Growing Older

 Pretty much, it's going to be your back.

No matter how carefully you lifted heavy (or light) things, no matter how well you took care of your physical shell via diet/nutrition, it's going to be your back.

And it will creep up on you in the most diabolical way. You'll be doing some innocent, innocuous task such as cleaning the garage and when you go to move the table saw, something you've done at least a hundred times over the years, you'll pivot in a way that causes your back to twinge...

That is, If you're lucky it'll only be a twinge.

Most likely it'll be a complete freeze up of your lower back that  will have you walking like a ninety-year old curmudgeon, every step carefully taken, one hand on your back, the other on whatever is close to gain support from.

So there you go, one of the joys of growing older.

Enjoy. 

Initial Reaction

As a white heterosexual male U.S. citizen all I feel about the situation in Washington DC tonight is shame.

As a white heterosexual male conservative U.S. citizen all I feel about the situation in Washington DC tonight is outrage.

As a white heterosexual male conservative who abhors politics all I feel about the situation in Washington DC tonight is disgust.

Somethings Cannot Be Put Back Together

Before anyone asks the answer is yes, I'm alluding to something other than a dead tree that's been cut down (though what I am alluding to is also dead nonetheless),

 

 

Ask A Funny Question, Get A Funny Answer

If the question is, what is the worst limerick you've heard lately...

 A randy old comedian from Chicago

Swore like an old sailor from Glasgow

When asked one afternoon 

Why she cursed like a goon

She said it's how we talk in the Bordello

Also Starring Dean Cameron As The Dock Fuel Station Attendant

The other day I ran into an old friend I had not seen since last Spring, and as we were catching each other up on what's transpired in our respective lives he told me about his attempt to enjoy a vacation last September.

It was an incredulous story.

He and his partner J, along with a few other friends. rented a 65-foot boat at Lake Powell in Utah, and were all set to enjoy a week of relaxation and merriment on the lake.

So they piled in the car and drove southwest from Denver...and promptly got caught in the first serious snowstorm of the season, which not only turned a usually casual, scenic drive into a slow nightmare of driving in limited visibility and avoiding icy patches, but also got them rear-ended by a driver who was not so adept at navigating through the aforementioned driving conditions.

That collision wasn't enough to deter their plans though, and after nearly 15 hours of driving (15 hours to drive a little under 400 miles...yikes), they arrived at the lake.

The boat they had rented did not come with a skipper, so D, who had served in the Navy and had a bit of experience on the water but not in piloting a 65 foot boat, had to take a short instructional course on handling a boat of that size.

After the short tutorial the crew set out for a week of fun cruising along the nearly nineteen hundred miles of shoreline that were created when the Glen Canyon dam was built in the late 1950's / early 1960's.

Except a few days into the voyage they lost one of the engines and had to make their way back to the Marina for repairs and to refuel. As D was not familiar enough with piloting a hobbled boat of that size to be sufficiently confident in his ability to safely dock the boat, they radioed the marina to send out a more experience pilot to handle the job. According to D, a young kid was sent out and, also according to D, put the boat into a slip at the fuel dock like a grizzled old pro.

The engine that had conked out was quickly repaired and the same young kid that had piloted the boat to the dock proceeded to refuel the boat (how much fuel goes into a 65 foot boat? 600 gallons. Fuel consumption for boats is measured in gallons per hour, and a 65 foot twin engine boat can use up to 15 gallons per hour).

After the refueling was completed D's party was all set to restart their vacation...and then BAM!, the boat suddenly lurched violently forward as if they had been rear-ended by another boat as they were still tied to the dock.

They all ran back towards the stern but immediately realized that something else had to have caused the loud boom and violent rocking of the boat, as there was no other boat behind them...which was when they smelled the smoke.

The harbor pilot/fuel deck attendant immediately started yelling "Fire! Fire! Everybody Run!"

A fire on a boat is a nightmare. A fire on a boat tied to a fuel dock is a potentially disastrous nightmare.

D told me he ran like he hadn't run in over thirty years (he meant that literally - he said it was the furthest and fastest he had run since his early twenties). The other members of the party also ran as fast and far as they could, with D stating that no one actually stopped until each and everyone of them just could not physically run anymore - one of them thinking they were going to have a heart attack due to the exertion and having to decide which would be worse, dying of a heart attack or in an explosion on a fuel dock.

Fortunately, the fire was contained before it had a chance to spread to the fuel dock or endanger any other boats or boaters at the marina, but it did consume the boat and bring an early end to the vacation.

And made my gripes about not getting a chance to take even a short vacation anytime soon very, very inconsequential.

Possibilty

On the one hand...everything that has occurred since the dawn of time, from the mundane to the sublime to the extreme, proves that the world is full of endless possibilities.

And on the other hand, no.

The Delicate Art Of Chosing The Right Path

There are people who believe that they have little or no control over their destiny.

There are also people who believe they can control, or at least influence, their destiny.

There is a distinct possibility that both groups are right and what makes them right is simply holding their respective beliefs.