Best Thing I've Heard today

"American music is like a river fed by many streams."
Alan Freed

Fast Track Funny Car

The Creature Known As The Ruseotokol!

No one had a plausible origin for the legend of the creature that the people of the village knew by the name Ruseotokol. 

Simply put, for generations without number the legend had existed, and so, with just slight variations in spelling, the creature had always been known as Ruseotokol.

Of course, for almost 200 years there have been efforts made to track down the origins of the legend.

Not of the creature though - it's possible existence has long been doubted, but the legend made for a good if odd story, so people have been fairly relentless in trying to unearth how it came about.

Most researchers have agreed it most likely began as a story told to children by parents as a means of imparting a life lesson - after all, it does have a boogie-man quality to it, even if the boogie-man in question, the Ruseotokol, does not actually do anything that harms anyone, and the traditional descriptions of it's physical appearance are far from fearful or intimidating. 

And, as no other reasonable explanation for a tale involving a three foot tall pink tumbleweed-with-feet, googly eyed and slobbery monster that is afraid of chickens has ever been presented, and the point of the legend being that one should never play in a sandbox without checking the sand for eggs makes sense in a community that depends on chicken ranching as it's economic base, there really doesn't appear any need to attribute any other possible origin.

Except for the once-in-every-blue-moon appearance of the bloody messages scrawled on the walls of every dining room in every house in the village...the messages that read "chickens have ghosts"...

Denver Mod Show, 2019

The Magic Number Of Mums

         More than this and it's just chaotic sensory overload

And The Old Man Said...

   The handle of the door that led into the small bar almost got away from him thanks to a sudden gust of frigid wind just as he pulled the door open. The few occupants of the place all threw him shut-the-damn-door glares as he stepped into the joint while stamping his feet.

   Though he only had to walk 25 feet or so from where he parked to the bar's entrance, he felt as if he'd just made his way through a full-on blizzard. He shook the dusting of snow off his jacket then walked up to an empty barstool and took a seat.

   The bartender, who all the regulars knew as Sammy but who always wore a name tag that said her name was Sharon, took his order with a smile and had it in front of him quickly. He grunted an acknowledgement of the service and gestured for her to keep the entire fiver for the $4.50 drink.

   The kid had been a regular for going on three years now, and he had yet to address the bartender as either Sammy or Sharon. He hadn't ever bothered to learn the names of any other employees of the bar or any of the other regulars, either. 

   The employees had all been pleasant to him, as they were all service industry veterans and that's just what they do. The other regulars all gave him his space, as that was what they did.

   Both the employees and regulars had taken to referring to him as "The Kid," when it was necessary to refer to him for whatever reason, as he was by far the youngest person that ever came into the place.

   That was as close to a nickname as he'd ever had, and that was possibly the one and only thing he could remember that made him feel as if he was a part of something. It's what kept him coming back. It was a very, very thin thread of connectivity, but it was more than he'd found anywhere else.

   He took a few deep sips then set the glass down and sullenly stirred the ice while staring at the crackled lacquered top of the decades old recycled shuffleboard bartop.

   Two barstools over, the regular all the other regulars referred to as the "Old Man" sat reading the paper. 

   In three years the old man and the kid had never once spoken to each other. Tonight, the old man decided he was going to change that.

   "Smile," the old man said in the direction of the kid. "Things could be so much worse."

   And the kid thought to himself, "Yeah, I could end up like you."

   With an odd smile the old man continued, "You could have extra toes on each foot, make finding a good pair of shoes a nightmare, or you could be missing a thumb on your favored hand, makes a chore out of grabbing a beer."

   The kid looked at the old man and wondered what he was getting at, or if he was getting at anything at all.

   "Or maybe you coulda lost your nuts to cancer...you gotta admit that it's easy to be happy thinking that hasn't happened, eh? Yeah, I saw a smile creep in there...no nut cancer, that's one that most every man can smile about."

   The kid sat quietly and politely, stirring the ice melting in his glass.

   "Yep," the old man said after a sip on his drink, "there is so much to either be happy you don't have or happy you do have. I mean, have you ever wondered what it would be like living in a meth-head infested abandoned trailer park in north Las Vegas? Oh sure, probably better than being homeless, but probably not by much, at least not in my book."

   The kid turned toward him and the old man flashed a smiling grin featuring mostly artificial teeth, which just about made the kid want to get up and walk away, but he didn't. The kid kept his seat, whether out of actual interest or respect for the man, or just plain old- fashioned good manners.

   After a few minutes of silence, the kid stopped playing with the ice in his glass and said, "Now, I'm not trying to be rude here Mister, but what would you know about hard times? What would you know about suffering from anything? I've seen the car you drive, I've seen how much you tip these girls here for bringing you a drink. You got money man, you got it made. You don't have to worry about where your next meal is coming from or none of the other crap most of us worry about every single day."

   The old man looked straight at the kid, then pushed his stool back from the bar as if to leave. He then reached down and slipped off his weird shoes and started to pull off his socks.

   The kid looked down at the old man's feet and saw that he had six toes on each foot. Then the old man took off his right glove and showed the kid his thumb-less hand.

   He looked at the drink one of the girls set down in front of him and smiled, then quipped, "You're just going to have to take my word for it that my nuts were snipped off, I'm not dropping trou in here to prove that to you."

   "As for my former residence in the city built by losers...what, you think I got this set of pearly whites from ol' Mother nature? These are what you get if you're lucky enough to break free from a meth addiction and get your life back together."

   The kid took the old man's display of deformities and reconstructed teeth in for a good long minute and swore under his breath.

   "Damn," he said, "How...how the hell did you do it?"

   "Not by myself kid, not by myself." 

Freedom To Chose From The Choices Presented

For whatever reasons there seems to be an effort on the part on many factions of the popular media to present a very black and white picture of the world, as if there were not a vast array of people with an equally vast array of world views.

Shame that, especially in light of how easy it is to use the internet to visit with people of every stripe, from every corner of the world.

Flavorful Fricassee Rattlesnake with Toasted Poppyseed Buttercake

Never, ever give a demon an even stake

In any game you're trying to win

There is no point in providing a level playing field

When you're playing the sinner against the sin

Be ruthless, be forceful

Speak with a voice that shakes windows

Grab the rube by the short hairs 

Bid second thoughts adios

Remember, you're not in this

For the glory, or money, or pride

You're in this for the satisfaction

That only kicking a devil's ass

Can provide

Coffee Break

The Teddy Bear Dancing On The Freeway

Driving along I-25 northbound when suddenly I spotted a Teddy bear bouncing along the road. My eyes quickly darted up along the highway to scan the speeding cars for the origin of said bear. About 30 feet ahead in the lane just to the right of the one I'm in I see a driver in an SUV turning towards the back seat that is occupied by a child safety seat, with, no doubt, a now crying if not outright wailing child in it.

The right turn indicator starts to flash as the SUV merges into the lane to the far right, and then into a lane that leads to the next exit.

There's no way the Teddy bear can be retrieved, but the driver of the SUV, most likely the parent of the former owner of the Teddy bear, is going to have to spend a lot of time calming that former Teddy bear owner down...and googling where the closest place a replacement Teddy bear can be bought.

Leaping Over The Chasm

Jefferson County, Colorado Fair & Festival

The Jefferson County Fair & Festival got into full swing this weekend. I've been a resident of this grand & glorious area of Colorado for over twenty years and I'd never paid a visit...until today

Like most every county fair the Jeffco Fair & Festival has a large array of attractions for visitors and participants, from a wide variety of food trucks...

...to a far better than expected Jazz-R&B-Funk-Rock-Blues band

And, of course, animals big and small

There are a number of talent competitions and challenges on the schedule too, such as:

Mutton Bustin' 

Cake decoratin'

Arts & Crafts shows and displays

And my favorite, pie eatin'

There are also pony rides and fantastic fun games for the kids...

Many more animals, some of them friendly, some not so much 

Even a playground for adults!

Quite a bit to enjoy, and more (you know, like a rodeo and stuff), all for just a $5.00 entrance fee (13 and up - kids 12 and under get in free).

Late 1960's, Early 1970's Sylvania Electronics Product Catalog Part 4

The last of the catalog. Everything electronic you could ever need to get into the swing of things...in 1972, give or take a few years.

Late 1960's, Early 1970's Sylvania Electronics Product Catalog, Part 3

Why of why am I still putting these pages up?

Posterity my friends, posterity.

BTW, pages 11,12, 13 & 14 are missing, so this post begins with page 15.

What kind of monster takes pages 11,12,13 & 14 from a catalog?

The worst kind.