The First Day Of April And Spring Is In The Air

   It started early. 

   Colin, half awake and bleary eyed, sat down to eat breakfast and Blamo! - someone had put a whoopee cushion on his chair, which nearly startled Colin right off it.

   After tossing the rubber bladder aside, Colin proceeded with his usual routine of adding salt and pepper to his eggs and then digging in for a bite - which he promptly spit out, as someone evidently switched the salt with sugar and there is nothing quite as shocking as sugar and pepper seasoned eggs.

   Colin poked at the bacon on his plate gingerly, until he was satisfied it was real bacon, then cut off a small corner of it to taste - it tasted like real bacon, so he lifted an entire piece to his mouth and took a full bite - only to discover that the lower half of the strip of bacon must have been marinated in hot sauce overnight, as his mouth was suddenly on fire.

   He reached for the glass of milk to his right and then immediately pulled his hand back - no sense in pushing his luck with the milk - so he got up and went over to the sink.

   Hurriedly taking a glass from the cupboard he turned on the cold tap and filled the glass, then gulped down about half of it before spitting out the hot water into the sink - apparently, someone had gone through the trouble of switching the hot and cold taps.

   Hyper alert now to the possibility that everything in his home was potentially rigged to fool him, he carefully made his way to his bedroom and just as carefully dressed to go to the gym - he wasn't going to chance shaving and showering at home, lord knows what could happen to the water temperature or supply, so he decided he could get some morning exercise at the gym and also prepare to go to work there - much safer that way.

   He tossed his gym bag into the backseat along with his work clothes and then sat down behind the wheel. Turning the ignition over resulted in a series of clicks. Colin instantly realized it was the ol' disengage-the-battery-cables trick, so he popped the hood and got out of the car to re-attach them. 

   Lifting the hood he discovered it was not the ol' disengage-the-battery-trick. It wasn't even the replace-the-battery-with-a-dead-battery trick. It was something a little more involved, a little more advanced.

   The entire engine had been removed. Colin stood in front of his car with the hood open and stared at the large empty engine compartment and came to an undeniable realization.

   It was going to be a long, long day.